Repercussions of an Earworm
by Psychochiquita
Summary: You know how you get a song stuck in your head and an image pops up from it? Well, I had full fledged stories develop from having specific ones stuck in my head for days. These Oneshots are the result of said earworm phenomena. Various characters, AU's, genres and lengths will affect these OS's, all inspired by songs, all rated T (just to be safe). Index on Chapter 1 w summaries.
1. Index

From teen get-togethers to fighting off zombies from space, these are my one-shot collective stories I have garnered from the farthest reaches of my mind (not that impressive, actually), and all are inspired by songs.  
Boo-hoo, I made song-fics, I hate myself too but the music,  
 _she speaks to me_.

* * *

 **Chapter 1;Index:**

 **Chapter 2:** **"The Girl From Ipanema" or "See Me"  
** Megamind and Minion are on their annual fishing trip to pebble beach when MM notices someone, _**different,**_ than the usual rowdy group of teens sharing the strip.

 **Chapter 3:** " **Sandman (Not That One)"  
** It's the end of the world and the lives of the survivors of Metro City rely heavily on two former villains and their boombox. Halloween edition.

 **Chapter 4: "Pleasantly Blue" or "Last Night"  
** Glitter and plushies and bruising oh my, Megamind wakes up in shambles without an ounce of recollection of last night. Minion tries to help him piece it together.  
Happy birthday Megamind!

 **Chapter 5: TBC  
**


	2. The Girl From Ipanema

**I finally did it, got the first OneShot for the songfic series I had been musing over for a while now, and I hope you get to enjoy them as I get them going!** _ **(slowly, oh so slow...)**_

 **For starters, I'd like to point out that in no way are these OS's meant to intertwine or connect with each other, although there might be a few in the same story/timeline. If so I will let you know which go with what and so on.**

 **Also, it is not necessary to listen to the song before hand, or during (since I write so long it would leave an awkward silence before finishing) but it does help understand the mood of the story when reading it if you've at least** _ **heard**_ **of the song before jumping in.**

 **Alright! for the first one of the series!**

* * *

 **2/24/2017**

 **"The Girl From Ipanema" or "See Me"  
**  
 **Megamind and Minion are on their annual fishing trip to pebble beach when MM notices someone, _different,_ than the usual rowdy group of teens sharing the strip.**

 **"Sing along" songfic, lyrics throughout the story.**

 **Words; 5,705**

 **Mood;**  
 **A bit of bashful, a lot of awe.**

 **Characters;**  
 **Megamind, Roxanne Ritchie, Minion here and there, OC's as a filler (of course)**

 **"The Girl From Ipanema" by Astrud & Jo** **ão Gilberto,** _ **Getz/Gilberto**_

 **S/N: I would've chosen Frank Sinatra's version, seeing as I'm a huge Sinatra fan, but two things came up.**

 **One, since I prefer to write in third instead of first (I don't see myself immersing into personal mindsets too easily) I couldn't very well use his because It's sung in first person.**

 **And B, I feel the suave bossa nova beat the original has adds to the exotic nature Megs feels when seeing Roxanne for the first time, even if they're in a not so exotic lakeside beach in the cooler months of Michigan (and that sexy saxophone tho, Stan Getz you were amazing).**

 **Also, the Portuguese intro (when translated) has that extra note of longing sadness lingering in there that I feel Sinatra doesn't portray as intensely in his (Sorry, Frankie).**

* * *

 _~Tall and tan and young and lovely~_

Well, she's taller than him at least, but only by an inch or so. He's always been on the short side, even comparative to his ancestors, but he sees it as a unique trait that he has, an advantage to have those assume his capability and second guess him when he proves just how dangerous he is.

He's not dangerous actually. He doesn't have to lift a finger when Minion is around, just make a threatening face and stand legs apart and shoulders squared back. Then his faithful fish puts in the threat for him through his robotic strength. So long as Megamind himself is not provoked or in any immediate danger, he won't cause harm to others.

But right now Minion isn't around, and he has to be careful being alone on the secluded area, in a spot that is hard to reach without an assist to get over the rocky barrier that separates his strip of land from the rest of the public beach.

They try to come to the beach annually around the same time each year, in September to catch the large abundance of salmon and lake trout in action just off shore where the water gets cooler. Minion usually goes in without his suit on or any protective gear that would inhibit his hunting since he prefers to go in up and personal. Megamind stays on the surface shoreline, keeping an eye on the robotic suit and screens that are monitoring Minions vitals.

He usually blocks out most of the sounds the public might make on the other side of the rock wall, but something drew him close to peek over the formation. He had been ignoring the stream of hip hop and R&B coming over from the other side when there was a break in between songs and he heard the familiar cowbell intro to "Don't Fear The Reaper" start, followed by protests and a voice loudly claiming "I just want to hear this one and then you guys can pop the tape out," with humor coming off the words.

And then he saw her, in capri's and a baggy red shirt that hung off one shoulder. Tall, by his standards, sun kissed skin tanned from the evening sun shining as she ran, laughing, through the foam that rolled up to shore, her dark hair swinging in loose curls over her half exposed shoulders. She was certainly young, younger than him by what seemed to be a couple of years if not around the same age, her eyes a strikingly softer shade of blue than the September sky.

And she was definitely lovely.

 _~The girl from Ipanema goes walking~_

She's a small town girl, originally. At least it's what he catches from the people who are speaking with her. From what he gathers they all piled into several vehicles too small to carry the crowd which gathered at the end of the beach. They're taking a weekend vacation from their quickly evolving young adult lives to be able to group together one last time before the busyness of adulthood overwhelms them and separates them from each other.

She's in mid conversation with a blonde companion asking her how her family's doing inland and had she been back to visit them ever since she moved to the city to start her career in journalism.

The brunette admits she had been too busy settling in her apartment and getting everything started for her new job in a station, the only thing he can grasp being "channel eight". The only free time she managed to snag was for the weekend, so it was either one or the other with choosing where to go. Being she was currently at the beach, it's evident her family will have to wait for the next opportunity.

She'd just recently graduated from a university across the state and instead of moving back in with her parents as they had hoped, she took an internship in the city with one of the news outlets helping with connecting the studio with other stations transferring videos and coverage. It was a great start to where she would eventually want to end up in the broadcasting world, being the voice of public interest and breaking news.

The two women have been walking close to the shoreline to the view of the other men standing nearby, staring and nudging at each other.

 _~And when she passes, Each one she passes goes,-~_

"Hey, Roxie! Catch!" yells one of the bigger guys with a buzzed haircut, throwing a Frisbee towards the brunette before she turned around completely and barely dodged the flying disk with a crouch, letting it fly overhead into the shore.

She smirks as the big guy gives out a groan and starts a jog past her to fetch the toy before it floats further into the lake.

"Sir? Sir, I think we can call it a day. The water is starting to get too cold down there and there's not as many swimming, most are hiding since they know I've been around. We should probably give it another shot tomorrow before sunrise," Minion calls out from the water surface, a thick rope hanging out of his mouth holding the catch he's had for the day.

Megamind brings his attention back to his fishy friend resting on the rocky shore, being sure to take hold of the net first to not risk letting go of what would be a part of their dinners for a year. They hunted for fish to expand their diet and having fresh caught always was a plus for them, even if the seafood had been held in an animated state while dehydrated.

It also helped Minion relax to be in his natural predatory state every once in a while, as they kept some of the fish live in the cubes, dropping one into his sleeping tank every once in a while when the hunting itch came.

After getting the net secured and Minion back in his suit, Megamind packs their mobile computer station and takes it inside their tent, going back outside to get the net so they can start separating and dehydrating the fish.

His campsite consists of a four person tent that has been camouflaged with a device he had been experimenting with that curves hard light to project a new image over something solid, hiding his mobile lab from prying eyes that might be wandering around in the forest lining the back of the camp, where it was easier to access the strip of beach but not without putting up a fight against the dense vegetation.

Having everything put away, the fish cleaned and separated and their gear ready to go for their morning hunt, Minion powers off in the middle of the tent as Megamind settles down on the floor in a sleeping bag. He nods off to the sound of the waves and laughter in the distance.

.

 _~When she walks, she's like a samba~_

The morning breaks with the sounds of upbeat Brazilian music cutting in through the twilight fog. Megamind wakes in a groggy state of mind, his thoughts slowly catching up with his surroundings when he jolts out of his sleeping bag, afraid of having overslept and missing out on helping Minion with his hunt.

After having noticed that Minion's suit is missing from its resting spot in the middle of the tent, he hobbles out to find it propped against a boulder next to the shoreline, the holding tank void of its ichtyoid owner. Looking around the shore in a panic, he eyes the water with worry until he sees the familiar metallic antenna break the surface, followed by the rows of organic antennae belonging to his companion.

"Minion!" he cries out, a rush of relief flooding through him, "Why didn't you wake me for the hunt? You know very well I dislike you being exposed and separated from your suit without supervision."

A Look of guilt crosses the olive colored aliens face. "I'm sorry Sir. You know how much I try to get you to rest, and when I saw you there actually sleeping for longer than thirty minutes, I, knew I couldn't force myself to wake you up."

Megamind exhales with a note of exasperation, bending over to reach for the net rope in Minion's jaws with his shoulders in a slump. "Alright, but just this once, Minion. I expect next time you awaken me fleetly so I will be able to keep proper overwatch."

Minion nods dutifully, looking off to the side with sadness. With a soft sigh, Megamind empties the net over a holding tank next to the computers. "Well, at least after you have the monitors assembled and the gear compiled," he adds quietly, turning his attention to the station to power up the monitors.

The small alien beams up at him with a toothy grin, and just as he opens his mouth to thank his comate a loud metallic clang comes over the petrous wall, making both brothers draw into themselves with a cringe and Megamind nearly drop the rope.

"What in heathens is that commotion?" he grits through his teeth, handing the rope over for Minion to hold back in his jaw. "Not sure Sir, it comes and goes over the rocks every once in a while. I'm thinking it's that group of kids," Minion replies quickly before bobbing underneath the surface and disappearing into the lake.

Eyeing the wall suspiciously, curiosity draws him close to the rocky edge making him peer over the formation to find the brunette dancing around in front of her camp, banging a wooden spoon onto a copper pot in an attempt to wake up the rest of her group for the morning.

He watches her with humored amazement as she keeps clanging the pot with the spoon, yelling out "Guys! Get up! Those stones aren't gonna find themselves! Getup-getup-getup-getup-" as a shoe flies out from one of the tents, followed by other objects from the various shelters meant to stop her noisy wake up call.

 _~That swings so cool and sways so gently~_

Her movements are jerky and ungraceful, her long hair flipping from side to side with the swaying of her head as her hand keeps moving the spoon over the bottom of the pot. Each item that's thrown out she easily dodges, the only moment her flow is as fluid as a ballerinas.

She giggles in delight with each twirling step, stiff legs kicking awkwardly to random heights and wide hips nudging to the music from the boom box sitting near her feet. She gives a few final _clang_ 's with the pot before letting it rest on one of the wood stumps they've been using as a seat, and stands facing a red tent with her arms crossed.

From inside a voice calls out "No one wants to go look for rocks, Roxanne."

"They're not rocks, they're agates. And it wont be just that, there's glass, too!" she cries out in excitement, heading towards one of the cars parked to the side to dig around in the trunk.

"Oh goody, just what we need. To be stepping on glass," comes from the disembodied voice.

"Come on, don't be such a sourpuss."

She pulls out a sandcastle building set from the trunk, setting it aside the dead campfire and running into the red tent head first, squeals of laughter and giggling suddenly arising from inside as the canvas quivers and shakes from the movements.

Her swinging behind pops out of the flap first, followed by her bending legs and swaying torso, her head clearing from the entrance as her arms move in a circular motion towards herself. Finally he sees whom the conversation and motions were aimed towards; a tall slender girl with hair dark as coal unkempt and matted in every which way from sleep, yawning and stretching after having stepped out of cover.

"You. can't. resist," the brunette chants in an unheard rhythm, curling both her index fingers in a _come hither_ towards the sleepy eyed raven haired girl, both of them smiling as the rest of the group climb out of the surrounding tents, some of the men already preparing the firewood while the young women pull out trays and coolers from the back of one of the trucks, using the truck bed as a prepping table for their breakfast.

Megamind presses himself closer to the rocks, turning over his shoulder in a wary glance first towards the water then to the monitors displaying the vitals to make sure he won't get caught by Minion abandoning his post.

 _~That when she passes, Each one she passes goes, aaaaaah.~_

"She's suck a dork," calls out a raven haired girl, her eyes lovingly following the blue eyed brunette skipping across the grounds, stopping every so often to turn over a rock in her hands and gently place it inside a plastic pail half full of water she carried in the crook of one arm.

The guy with the buzzed haircut cups his hand over his mouth to yell out "Hey, Roxie! Stop playing with rocks when you can play with my- _OOMPH,_ " when the ravenette forces her elbow into his midriff, knocking the wind out of his sentence. "Just because Alex invited you doesn't mean I have to play nice," she warns through gritted teeth.

"My bad," a mousy haired girl to which he assumes is Alex mumbles around the food in her mouth, lowering the sandwich in her hands to her lap. "He promised to be on his best behavior."

"Damn, Alva, don't have to be such a bitch," comes from one of the guys on her other side.

"Shut up Anthony, just trying to defend m'ladys honor," she replies, raising her own food to take a bite.

"If you guys are so in love why don't you run away together?" snides another girl, dark brown hair highlighted with loud blonde streaks tied back into a high ponytail.

Megamind draws his eyelids low, a tense frown pulling his lips down in discouragement. He almost pushes off the wall when he hears the ravenette snap back "Because unlike you I don't part my legs for anyone who holds the door open for me."

His eyes light up with evil delight at the comment, making him hug the rock closer with excitement.

"Besides, we're just heterosexual life mates," Alva clarifies, taking a drink from the brown bottle at her feet while ignoring the gawking and smug looks (and in highlights case, piercing glare).

One of the guys across the fire finishes taking a swig and says "Yeah, but that don't stop you from trying, do it? I mean, she's a hot nerd," earning him a slap on the chest by the girl with highlights sitting under his arm, a look of "what?" crossing his face.

"Calm down big boy, she's too much for you to handle, you don't even know what monogamy is," she says after lowering the glass from her lips.

"Isn't it, a type of wood?" asks buzzed haircut next to her after gaining his breath back.

"Yes, numb nuts, it's a type of wood, thank you for proving my point," she says, taking another long swallow from the bottle as they all look out to the brunette skipping across the shoreline in search for more agates.

Satisfied, Megamind pushes himself off the rock and heads back to the monitors, following Minions movements underwater until the temperature drops well below hunting range and the sun is long gone from the sky. Packing up the equipment they head back into the tent to clear out the nets and organize everything before calling it a day.

.

 _~Ooh, but he watches so sadly.~_

He sneaks out in the middle of the night from restlessness. He's been walking along their private area of the beach and through the wooded expanse behind where their tent is set up as well. He doesn't realize how far he's accidentally wandered until he sees the fire roaring and hears the muted chatter of the young beach dwellers almost behind him, meaning he's walked far enough to pass the other group's encampment.

He tries to sneak back around to his tent before anyone from the group hears or sees him. And Minion. He definitely doesn't want to get caught by Minion. He's almost past the clearing when he spots her strolling down the shore line, kicking at the foam and stray pieces of wood.

She's been walking along with a washed up piece of drift wood that's long and thin enough to be used as a walking stick. Slowly she's making her way across the moonlit ground huddled inside a pullover hoodie, the wind picking up a chill as it brushes off the water and blows through her, causing a tug-of-war between pulling her hood up and having it blown off by the breeze.

She stops abruptly, seeming to tilt her head in thought before reaching down and picking up a stone from the ground below, turning it over once and pocketing it into her hoodie's pouch.

 _still rock hunting-_ he thinks to himself, hugging tightly against the trunk of a birch.

He's huddled inside his own jacket, fighting against the night's cool breath to keep himself warm and yet he feels the need to run over there and throw his coat over her, completely ignoring his shivering in the want to protect her from the bitter wind.

He almost steps away from the tree in absentmindedness when someone standing up from the fire and walking past him makes him freeze in place reflexively, instinct having him slump into the shadows of the forest.

He watches as the person walks over to the brunette, offering to cover her with half of the blanket they have over themselves revealing them to be one of the other men who hadn't spoken ill of her in the previous exchanges.

He watches. The two of them walking under the shared blanket back towards the group. The group of young adults sitting idly around the campfire, passing cans of refreshments and bags of edibles. The fact that they're all _normal_ , and he's, well, not.

He walks back to his tent more in determination than sadness, mind set on making a few changes to one of his favorite watches if he were to make any changes to his ability to blend into the crowd.

 _~How can he tell her he loves her?~_

Throughout the next day he can hear them on the other side of the rocks, laughter and singing carried over by the wind. Most of it's begrudging to him, although every once in a while he's honestly curious if any of the laughter is coming form the brunette with blue eyes.

He spends most of the evening tinkering with the watch that is meant to carry a compact version of the camouflaging technology he has on their tent, so far only being able to get it to change his clothing at will and add hair to his head, hiding the size of his over-sized cranium but not being able to get it to cover his skin color.

After the watch sparks out for the umpteenth time, he throws it down on his sleeping bag in a fit and marches out past Minion who had been practicing his crochet, following the young blue man's stomping charge towards the tent entrance from the corner of his fish eyes.

Outside, away from his brothers sight, he gives in to the sound of the water coming over the pebble lined shore. Pulling off his boots and rolling the pant legs of his over clothes above his knees he wades into the water, the undercoat he's been working on preventing it from soaking all the way through but not really keeping out the chill it gives.

He's been standing in the shore for what seemed to be hours, not paying attention to the fact that the sun has been long gone but still taking in the colors of the sunset nonetheless. Minion calls him back inside, insisting they rest for one last shot at a hunting spree before the weekend is up.

Reaching his sleeping bag he glares at the watch, his jaw working in circles popping his temple in thought. He picks it up and sits down on the bag crossed legged while pulling back the small tool kit he had also tossed aside earlier.

After a few more minutes of tweaking he feels he's done what he could for the night and gives a satisfied nod, placing the watch on a worktable beside him. Climbing into the bag he waits for Minion to turn off their lanterns keeping light inside the tent, listening to the familiar wir of his water filter operating under stand-by mode.

Sleep comes and goes for him, most days not feeling the need to sleep at all and this night doesn't seem to be any different for him. He stares at the tent top, fidgeting with his fingertips before giving up and getting out of his sleeping bag. He reaches for his jacket hanging off one of the fold-up chairs, stopping to strap on the holographic watch as an afterthought before heading out into the night.

 _~Yes, he would give his heart gladly~_

She's sitting on top of a smoothed out rock on the other side of the wall, and at first he's not sure how she's been able to climb so high without an assist, but he's intrigued enough to stay still when he spots her after having climbed up his half of the wall.

He sits at the very top to overlook her and the rolling waves that she's gazing out to. The rock curves naturally into a nook that he uses as a leaning seat, getting himself comfortable before resting his head back to look up at the starry night. The whispering breeze and foaming waves lull in the background as they both sit in serene silence.

He's on the verge of nodding off with the hood of his jacket pulled over his head, when he hears her moving her way up the rocks and freezes. He looks down slowly and sees she hasn't noticed him yet so he tries his best to stay as quiet as he can while blending into the shadows of the rocks.

Until she looks up and sees him, a figure in the dark, and screams. He scrambles to get off the rocks as he fights the wrist watch to disguise him when he jumps in a bush, not realizing there isn't anything solid underneath the shrub.

He slips. He's not sure if he got the watch to work before she could actually see him, but all he is able to see is a bright light flowing over his eyes before falling into a pit of darkness.

And hitting his head with a hard _smack_ on the rocky surface on his way down.

 _~But each day, when she walks to the sea~_  
 _~She looks straight ahead, not at him.~_

"Ohmygod-are-you-okay? Don't.., don't move, that was a hard fall," he hears underneath him at first when everything feels like someone shifted the direction of the earth and gravity is now pulling his head forward and down. He opens his eyes and sees darkness, and for a split second almost has the urge to scream out loud _NO-NO NO I'M BLIND EVIL HEAVENS ABOVE I'M BLIND_ but finds his composure when he jerks his head up and realizes his face was resting in a patch of tall grass.

He spins around so he's now sitting upright, and looks around nervously expecting bright lights and screaming and suits charging towards him when suddenly his eyes focus on the skin coming out of his jacket sleeve that's now white, not blue, and raises his other wrist up to stare at the watch hard with amazement.

"It.., it worked," he mutters in disbelief that something he created actually _worked_ for the first time since the de-gun, his biggest project thus far. Sure, he's made small scale plasma rays and has done early rudimentary work on canine AI units and has a room specifically set for his robotic creations back in their temporary lair, but he never expected something he had his heart set on and poured months of toil into to actually _work_.

"Yeah, I think that fall did a number on you. Your head looks a little, swollen," he hears as he starts to feel a slight pressure onto the side of his head, and looks up in time to see the brunette flinch her hand back from where she had it resting above his ear. They stare at each other for a moment before both looking down to his left knee where her hand's resting.

She pulls it back and holds it out in front of him, asking him if he can count the fingers she has up, and after a few more questions she feels satisfied enough to hold her open hand out to help him up.

They sit on a small mound of earth not far from her camp, the fire roaring off in the distance. She mumbles about how great her friends are and they must've been sleeping off the beers someone brought for no one to have heard her scream. He's not sure if it was sarcasm or not so he nods along, wincing immediately with regret when the hammer of pain hits his temple.

He stands up and dusts off his pants, telling her he has to get going back to his tent before his brother wakes up and doesn't see him in bed, although he's pretty sure the scream should've woken _him_ up.

She holds him back for a moment, saying "You know, if, you're still hurting you shouldn't go to sleep. At least until the swelling subsides. Could you at least do that for me,...?" as she holds out her hand once again, an opening for him to introduce himself.

He stares at her hand, the action routinely seen in the wardens office every time someone were to step foot in it, even if the person wasn't well liked, yet so foreign to himself that for a moment he was struck dumb when confronted with it.

His hands never leave his coat pockets and she slowly starts reeling her fist back in, to which he finally shakes his head to snap himself back into place and sputters and apology, waving his hands out towards her.

"No, no-sorry, it's not you, I'm just not used to-"

"It's okay, I should be the one apologizing," she cuts in. "I didn't mean to impose. You don't have to tell me your name if you don't want to."

He gives a look which she mistakes for relief, and adds "I think it's better if we don't use names. Might be easier that way. Just promise me you'll see me tomorrow so I can check up on you, 'kay green eyes?"

He blinks, before slowly nodding and responding "Yeah.., blue".

She smiles up to him as she stands up while brushing herself of dirt, and he watches her walk back to her camp fire before making his way back towards his own tent.

 _._

 _~Tall, and tan, and young, and lovely~_  
 _~The girl from Ipanema goes walking~_

He visits the next day at the break of dawn, keeping his distance from the rest of the young adults as he tries to help blue eyes pack up her equipment. They load the last of her items into the back of the truck she was sharing with four others. She huddles with the women of the group for a shared conversation before separating with a laugh and grabbing Megamind by the wrist to lead him to walk along the shore.

"I only have a few minutes of peace before they finish shoving the last of their stuff in the truck bed and I have to ride the rest of the way back home crammed like a can of sardines," she says, and Megamind notices he feels sadness at being informed of her leaving.

 _what'd you think you were helping her with, stupid? of course she's leaving, weekend's over._

It's obvious she's leaving because of course he and Minion will be leaving in a few hours as well, but the fact of the matter is that it hadn't sunk in until he physically heard her say it. The feelings must've been evident on his face, for when he looks away towards his shuffling feet, she speaks out "Hey, this doesn't have to be goodbye. We can keep in touch. I can, give you my phone number and we can talk-" "I, don't have a phone," he interrupts with a mutter.

"O-kay" she says, looking off to the side as she nervously plays with a lock of her hair. Looking back, she says "Or, we can swap addresses so we can write-" "I-I'm sorry. It's just I'm constantly on the move, and pretty technologically impaired so I wouldn't be able to figure out how to find you online," he lies, being the half truth that he _is_ on the move a lot, and wouldn't be able to figure his way through the expanse of social media websites that are spreading through the virtual world like wildfire.

Besides, he would feel like an intruder looking in through the window of her life.

She gives out a small "Oh" of disappointment, before he proclaims "B-b-but! If you, give me your address I could probably send you something every once in a while from where ever I am, just to, you know, keep in touch". She smiles with a nod as her hand continues its pull on her hair, her fingers twisting the locks tightly around the knuckles making them turn pink and yellow from the pressure.

He gives a pointed look to her hand and she pulls her hands down to her sides with embarrassment.

"I, uh, shh..," she stutters, looking around before settling forward on the path they've been walking along. "I, have a terrible nervous habit of playing with my hair. Usually it's just tucking it behind my ear. I think I've been doing it more recently because I've been wanting to cut it short, but people have been telling me a woman with no hair doesn't get far in life because no one sees her as a woman". She folds her arms across her chest and looks out sourly to the lake water.

Megamind has a look of thoughtfulness before saying "Well, whoever they are, they sound asinine. I think you'd look nice with short hair." _great, actually._ She turns towards him with a pensive look herself, before giving a shy smile and leading the way for the rest of their walk.

 _~And when she passes~_  
 _~He smiles, but she doesn't see.~_

He walks her all the way down the side of the beach until they reach a mass of dead trees and rocks crumbled over from a recent storm, preventing them from walking further without wandering into the deep forest. They make their way back in hushed conversation, talking about nothing in particular seeing as he never has anyone to really talk to other than Minion, and it's usually over plots and creative ideas.

He feels the sadness again when they reach the truck. They can't help but fidget in awkward silence for a few moments before she extends her arm out towards him with a smile and says "It was nice meeting you. My name's Ritchie. Roxanne Ritchie."

He stares at her open palm before slowly placing his inside her grasp and giving two weak shakes, looking up to her to say "I thought no names," while still gripping her hand.

"I just thought you should know mine if you wanted to find me again," she shrugs before retracting her hand and climbing into the open door of the truck where her friends had been waiting inside to leave. She rolls down the window and hands him a piece of paper with an address scribbled on it, and he sees its for the neighboring Metro City. Where he lives.

Inside she adjusts herself in the spot and he can hear the guy in the driver's seat shift the gears from park when the truck starts groaning in protest before giving in with a sputter. She turns around to look out the window towards him standing there with his hand still holding the piece of paper she'd handed him. She gives another smile with a small wave and he waves back, his face stretching into a grin.

 _~She just doesn't see.~_

The truck is in the distance when he brings his hand down to pocket the piece of paper, and brings it back up in front of his face. He stares with a look of awe first that slowly turns into a grimace and brings his other hand in to turn the disguise off, the bright light enveloping him before exposing his blue skin and natural state.

"Sir? Sir! I've been looking everywhere, what are you doing all the way out here? Someone might see you!" exclaims Minion as he trudges out of the trees that leads to their campsite.

"Well maybe we should stop hiding so much and let people _see_ us for once," he states out loud as he looks down to his feet kicking the small pebbles that lined the beach-side.

Minion has a small frown as he responds "Well, we can talk about it when we get back to the lair, but first we need to get our things packed up and put away in the car". Megamind starts his slow walk back to their camp spot hidden in the forest as he eyes the watch on his wrist.

 _Next time I see her, I'll make sure she sees me._

Just as they reach the edge of their camp, he shakes his wrist out to Minion in excitement to show him the success of his latest invention.

"Minion, look! It works!"

* * *

 **After Note;**

 **Okay, maybe I** _ **am**_ **dead. Or at least dying. I'm sick** _ **AGAIN**_ **and I got it from a bunch of** _ **toddlers**_ **at my moms baby shower (oh joy, such happiness, kill me now.)**

 **I'm falling asleep as I fill this in. Psh I guess I'll sleep when..., I get home (I only sleep in four hour intervals...). Currently stealing WiFi from a McDonalds since I don't have internet in my new place (did I mention I moved? last apartment pooped out after ANOTHER heavy dose of flooding, had to relocate, long story blah blah) such bad luck, huh? Methinks someone gave me** _ **mal ojo...**_

 **"Don't fear the Reaper" in reference to one of my personal favorite SNL skits, making the connection here with Will Ferrell I couldn't help myself but plug it in.**

 **Monogamy is not a wood. You should know that.**

 **Aside from finding beach glass, you can also find these very pretty minerals called** _ **agates**_ **on the beaches of Michigan, in heavier concentration around the shore of Lake Superior because of the massive Iron deposits intermingling with the exposed lava underneath the lake where the tectonic plates started to split apart for the Mid-continent rift and blah blah there goes my gemstone nerdiness...**

 **Alright alright, need to get this other mess up and running for you lovelies, I've been away for far too long and have been aching myself to get some work done and posted for you tesoros, so here they are.**

 **Much love (and hope);**  
 **-** _ **the little one**_


	3. Sandman (Not That One)

**Okay, I'm back. I think.**

 **Although not necessarily alive ._.**

 **It's been a tough year for us, not just me, and I don't think I can get in the groove of things fast enough to get back on track but shit that's not enough to deter me from trying.**  
 **However I will say I am sorry. I really hoped these massive stills in my mind would waver and die down at some point but they continue their lingering attack. I wouldn't even call them writer's block anymore since a block implies there was something coming through to begin with. But fudge it, this is my way of apologizing and I hope it comes through to help with this "block" I've been having.**

 **And just in time for Halloween, too!**

 **10/29/17**

 **Sandman (Not That One)**  
 **It's the end of the world and the lives of the survivors of Metro City rely heavily on two former villains and their boombox.**

 **"Inspired by" songfic, no lyrics (although you can play the song at the chosen time when described)**

 **Words: 2913**

 **Mood: Serious and Unsettling, breaking into calamity and borderline hilarity. There is a happy ending, but at a cost.**

 **Characters: Megamind, Minion**

 **"Mister Sandman" by The Chordettes,** **Single** **, 1954**

 **Alright, let's rock this joint!  
**

* * *

Those who witnessed their arrival, and survived the first waves of attack, claim they fell from the sky.

People didn't know what to do with them in the beginning. They looked, harmless, with their friendly forms and colorful pigmentation. What was one to expect from something so small and innocent?

The scientists who harbored the creatures didn't know what they fed off of at first when studying their behavior (or lack thereof). As far as they could tell these things didn't really have mouths. Or limbs.  
Or possibly conscious thought. If anything they more closely resembled marimo moss, which came to a surprise when one of the less experienced interns thought to feed one of the balls of fluff blood meal and it showed signs of positive reaction.

That should've been the first sign.

During a standard inner building transport one of the loading dock staff noticed the moss would shift erratically when its containment unit was stored adjacently to a cage of testing mice. Drawing curiosity, more testing was conducted on the reactive moss when placed within the confinements of a live animal, its soft fur-like coverage shifting to reveal long wisps that were eventually concluded to be feelers.

 _That_ was the first sign.

Proceeding with caution and following through the standard practice that came with handling a live and potentially dangerous biological threat, the moss balls were sent to be secured in a solitary lab set in a more desolate section of the research wing. Access was restricted to level III and only those with a double guarded suit were allowed to handle the creatures, ensuring they would not pick up the scent or vitals of living tissue underneath. As was such the progress of research proceeded without disturbance in the protection of the sectioned laboratory.

However all the safety defenses and containment precautions in the world could hold no measure of idiocy for the well-being of mankind. As was proven by one of the first responders to the scene of the landing site.

,:':,

In the shadow of downtown Metro City stood a six-story apartment complex, fifteen apartments per floor that housed the average single working individual with the exception of a young family on level four.

A few of the tenants had been milling around when the landlord trudged his way through the lobby trailing an EMT and the fire chief, a ring of keys jingling nervously in his hands. It had been at the least a week since anyone had heard from the young technician and the neighbors below his room had complained of a distinctive smell of molasses lingering in the air.

A couple of hesitant knocks and a hard shove of a wooden door later and the heavy smell of beet sugar attacked their senses, the only thing that was available to them in the dim and quiet apartment.

The chief took hesitant steps towards the center of the living area, cautious of the dead silence and weary of the dark corners as he called out to his subordinate.

"Moore?"

Receiving no response the fire chief turned on one heel to give a shrug of uncertainty towards the landlord and EMT standing in the kitchen entrance, waiting in the awkward silence when the sudden sound of shuffling and a thud drew their attention to the bedroom.

Being the closer responder, the chief moved in position to open the bedroom door where the sickly strong smell of sweetness clung to the heavy humidity that poured from the room.

The EMT will later recall thinking the firefighter must've been sick if the mounds of multivitamins and the humidifier being on full blast was anything to account for. He will also recall being unsettled by the thick coverage of overgrown plant life creeping up the bedroom walls, the leaves and stamens fluttering in the breeze.

And remember how there was no fan on.

Once the chief had walked into the room, the landlord following close behind, the EMT admittingly let his nerves get the best of him and planted himself firmly in the middle of the living room, bolting out the front door at the sounds of the first screams.

And that's how humanity was introduced to The Mass.

* * *

The physical competition was so sad, they were even given the opportunity to run on a few occasions. Which in case lead to the immediate dismemberment and disfiguration beyond recognition of what was once a living organism known under the binomial name of _Homo Sapiens Sapiens._

Many instances the choices seemed trivial, a clearance on the field where the risk ran low and the prospect of freedom was too inane to ignore. In others the chances ran hazardous, a gap between waves of attacks or a brief opening in the fog of war and death that seemed to be a liberating opening.

Either ways, the option to escape was always overshadowed by the prospect of receiving the same results. Agonizing and reciprocating slaughter.

Out in the distance of the rising drafts of chemical smoke and rotting meat were the remnants of the city, destroyed within itself and fallen by the hands of righteous leaders sought to clarify their lands of its mistakes as god had leveled Sodom and Gomorrah.

Smells of molten iron and blood-stained lands, the deafening silence from the absence of sound within the once sprawling metropolis, the scenery shook the two beings standing on the edge of an abandoned warehouse roof overlooking what was once their domain in which they ran rampart, void of the civilians whom at a point would flee from their chaos and climactic actions.

With a kick of an empty shell casing from a reinforced boot, one of them muttered "So much for taking over the city," before they both made their way to check on the blockade they had set up earlier in the week.

Being a creature of habit the blue man did not let the despairing surroundings depress him, at least not to face value, and had summoned the energy to hoist himself over a battered city bus resting on its side which up to that morning had been in use as a barricade.

With the perimeter security breach throwing everyone within the confines of their refuge in a frenzy, The Overlord himself sought to clear the threat and patch up the barrier before the danger would prove their current location unsafe to keep as a sanctuary.

Although with the title of Overlord came the assumption there were individuals to order and a functioning civilization to rule.

With the swagger of someone preparing for a fight, The Overlord paced down the length of the bus from one end to the next, his right hand man standing aside with a duffle bag slung over one shoulder watching him attentively while keeping caution to the streets below them in case any of the Mass decided to make an early appearance.

"I think we should set up here, I have sights on the intersection up ahead and the alleys filter out in both directions leaving them with nowhere to head to in case they try to back-track. From this height I should be able to clear out any that might've made their way past the bus and we could work our way forward to secure the breach through the first barrier once they start trickling in."

"But Sir, this setting leaves you exposed by all sides and with all the sound we'll be making that's surely inevitable, they might not be known to climb but they can pile on each other pretty well-"

"In which case leaves more openings for someone else to take the shot if I get crowded, hence why _you're_ here."

"I still don't like it," his henchman responded bitterly.

"Just set up the sound system, Minion."

The robotic suit moved mechanically as Minion brought the bag down from his shoulders to drop between his feet with a _clemp._ The fishlike being eyed his boss with exasperated annoyance while going through the bag to pull a cylindrical speaker that stood at waist height when he bolted it to the side of the bus.

Uncoiling wires and pulling a laptop from a side slot, the henchman set to readying the sound system as the blue man took note from which direction the, _things_ , might wobble from first.

The parasite was known to be attracted by the low pitch of rumbling thunder, as they had first witnessed during a late thunderstorm. However, they also seemed to be sensitive to the waves emitted by high soundwave frequencies to the point of being stunned, the Hz count lingering around the capacity of a burglar alarm.

Luckily for them, both The Overlord and Minion tolerate soundwaves at a much higher frequency, and The Overlord found it immensely useful to be able to layer the vibrations over a few of the songs on his "showtime" playlist.

After sighting-in his scope he looked over his shoulder towards Minion, giving him a sly smile with a nod for confirmation to start the song.

"Which one, Sir?"

He was in the midst of replying when his attention snapped back towards the streets, the sound of a guttural scream rising from a Mass.

"Shit. I guess we're going to have to start early," The Overlord said as the first of the parasite infested bodies loomed forward from their hiding spots, spotted trails of black and brown left behind each one as they rushed forward towards the source of another potential host.

He raised his scope to his eyes and immediately had one of the pulsating organic _things_ in his crosshairs, readying position from his spot on the side of the bus.

"Sandman."

Minion began to type away furiously on his keyboard over the sounds of the gun going off in quick succession as his boss picked off a few of the hosts edging their way forward. He quickly dropped the gun to his side and gave a stabbing kick towards a Mass lingering under the edge of the bus before it could figure out how to climb over, then brought the gun back up to shoot off another couple of rounds into the creeping crowd ahead of them.

He slowed his shooting when the sound of static and clapping came over the speaker, then stopped shooting all together when he heard a- _barbershop quartet_ he realized with disbelief, start singing in varying "bung's". He couldn't help his head rolling over to glare at Minion when the ladies started to sing.

"Not," he raised his gun and blindly shot out towards the horde, "- _that_ one."

"I'm sorry Sir! I have-, I have no idea how this, _happened_ , I-I-"

"Change it!"

"I can't!"

"Why-" _BAM_ "Why not?!"

"It says 'exe stopped working'."

"WHAT-" the blue man shouted sternly over shoulder, "how is that even-, it's a song, not a program!"

He shot off a few frustrated rounds into a group of Mass rounding out a corner to their far left, coming out of one of the back alleys in groves. Once he whittled the group down to a few lone stragglers he set his focus on the ones pouring out of a shuttered mechanic store slightly to his right, his voice venting out over the song.

"How the hell did that one end up playing?"

"It's in order."

"What 'order' and _why_ do we even _have_ that song to begin with?!," he griped lowering the gun, trails of gunpowder smoke lingering off the chamber while he made a few adjustments and let it cool briefly from its moment of overheating.  
There were a lot more of the Masses than he was prepared to take on with just the two of them.

"We used it during a plot to create a serum for sedating Metro Man-, Sir you sure you don't want me to bring out any more muscle from the Lair? At least another form of firepower-"

"If those idiots hadn't put off the scavenge we-" _BAM_ "-would have properly raided the military-" _CLA-CLACK BAM_ "-military base and everyone would have a proper means to def-" _CLACK-BAM_ "-end themselves instead of some shitty ass twenty twos and a Barrett, which no one can figure out how to handle _properly_ -" _CLA-CLA-CLICK_

 _CLICK-CLICK-CLICK_

He eyed his gun with hate, gritting his teeth at being so caught up in his anger to have ignored the signs his weapon was overheating drastically.

"You could've at least let Metro Man stay to help out," his henchfish muttered behind him, drawing a deeper scowl and adding napalm to the fire.

"Oh, _Metromahn_ , I can't do without you, so helpless as the villain now the world has ended, save me," the blue man retorted in a mocking high pitched voice, his hands flailing around and fanning his face dramatically only briefly before the scowl returned to his face and he went off.

"That bumbleheaded buffoon wouldn't know how to save anyone that isn't surrounded by cameras, he's just as useless after civilization as he was back then trying to deter _actual_ crime!"

"But at least he could help fend off the Masses!"

"I can do that on my own! He needs to help those that aren't lucky to have _two_ supers!"

"That doesn't mean he couldn't have helped us regain control before he le- _SIR!"_ the extraterrestrial fish raised an arm to warn the angry villain of a Mass climbing over the edge of the bus, a few of its ribbon like tendrils from its head swinging around madly towards one of his booted feet.

He turned in time to side step the ribbons and crush them under-boot, lifting and swinging his leg again to connect with the shell of its head and send it sprawling over the mound of Masses on the side of the bus that had created during their exchange.

"Minion turn it off!" The Overlord shouted over the chiming-piano singing women and the buzzing growls from the Massive. He threw a coupled of hard jabbed kicks and knocked a few that made it to the top of the swarming pile. They seemed to find the song _appealing._

"I'm trying! I _-GEH!"_

Turning towards his companion panic took over the slender blue alien, seeing a handful of Masses climbing over the mechanical suit he'd made him in their youth, their ribbons poking and prodding to find access into his holding tank.

Forgetting all about the strength the suit itself had from its power armor, The Overlord rushed to free his brother from the swarm trying to crush the suit. He had succeeded to incapacitate a couple when a third climbed over the edge of the bus and stumbled towards the blue alien with sluggish movements, throwing its weight onto the man's back and bringing him down to the glass siding of the bus.

"Get off me!" he cried out as he struggled against the hard casing surrounding the parasite hiding inside what used to be a human head, cocooned in layers of dried membrane and hardened tumors making it look similar to the shell of a walnut. And an old one too, judging by the strength of the casing.

"I said _get OFF!"_ he cried with more uncontained panic, the ribbons unfurling themselves from within the casing and making their way towards the blue man's head and neck.

"MINION!"

The Mass imploded on itself, what would have been the partial lobe launching cleanly off the left side of its head in a cloud of maroon and black dust as the ribbons went limp and the dead weight fell on top of The Overlord.

A split second after the body dropped did he hear the telltale echo of a distant gunshot, followed by a couple more as Minion was freed from two of the four Masses that had overtaken him, giving him enough room to work on neutralizing the last two.

Still on his back, the blue alien tossed the body aside with a grunt while catching his breath, finally regaining control over his pulse to look over where the delayed _crack_ 's came from.

Half a mile down their path with a squint of his eyes he caught glimpse of a dark figure huddled close to a rooftop adjacent to their lair, a hand shooting out from the darkness ending in a fist with a single middle digit raised towards his direction.

"You think she's still mad at me?" he muttered as Minion helped him regain his footing.

"I told you not anger Miss Ritchie, I'm pretty sure she's been watching ever since we left," Minion replied with a tone that was almost scolding.

"I'm sure she was just, setting her calculations and couldn't aid sooner. We don't all have the luxury of taking time to do adjustments on an oversized 50 cal," his boss offered as an excuse, his attention taken up by checking on his gun.

The sudden pass of a _thiss_ by his blue ear combined with a ripping burn and a _thud_ of a Mass collapsing behind them was her reply.

"Nope, she's still mad," Minion replied smugly.

The Overlord gripped his left ear with a hiss. "How the hell did she know what I was saying?!"

"You still have your earpiece on you blue moron," her voice suddenly manifested inside his right ear making him jump slightly, Minion restraining a snicker as his boss tried to burn him down with a glare.

"For the love of Hodr just change the damn song already."

* * *

 **At the cost of his ear, happy ending with a not so happy Roxanne.**

 **Oliver had asked why Roxanne was mad. I said knowing her and their relationship, it could've been anything from Megamind being a hero when she didn't want him to, to maybe he forgot to put down the toilet seat.**

 **So, there you have it, I hope you guys enjoyed it.** **It was actually fun brainstorming this one with hbthing (he was the one that came up with the "competition" sentence, I asked if it was okay to use since he does writing of his own as well) and I came )THIS( close to abandoning the story, even about to scrap it at one point only to spill the rest of the words out the next day. I haven't had this much flow in a while so It's been a little wavy getting my steps aligned.**

 **The idea came during an exchange with a friend over how funny it seemed to me that the common element when it comes to music and Megamind is that he's a fan of** _ **Enter Sandman**_ **by** **Metallica** **, as well as combined with the occasional occurrence that whenever I try to look up a specific song in my library my laptop insists I meant x instead of y ("This Charming Man" "Semi Charmed Life" and "Charmless Man" is one that happens WAY too often).**

 **I'll be back soon though, loves, I promise.**

 **Love and Misery,**  
 **-P.C.**


	4. Pleasantly Blue

**WADDUP FISHES!  
I'm back (and broken record, dead), but hey that's not stopping me from moving forward!  
I'm hoping I'm getting this out in time for Megamind's birthday, although technically since it's a morning after story you should be reading it on the 18** **th** **', '**

 **A KNEE WHO, I'm so relieved to get this one out, and thank you to all my readers and commenters and those skimming by and those that maybe accidentally clicked on it and unintentionally didn't mean to read it but did anyway I THANK YOU ALL, it makes me less gloomy to see someone still reads through.**

 **To the good stuff!**

* * *

 **12/17/17**

" **Pleasantly Blue" or "Last Night"**  
 **Glitter and plushies and bruising oh my, Megamind wakes up in shambles without an ounce of recollection of last night. Minion tries to help him piece it together.**

 **"Inspired by" songfic, no lyrics. Actually, the song has barely anything to do with the story anymore, this one developed into a whollup of a monster on it's own and turned a sharp right into cush cuddly fluffiness.  
Warning, fluffiness.**

 **Words:9762 (woo puppy)**

 **Mood: Funny, silly, cute drunk Megamind, No, Megamind no, Stop, NO, MEGAMIND DON'T DO THATNO-**

 **Characters: Megamind, Minion, Roxanne, Fillers (sorry fillers)**

" **Pleasantly Blue", 4 Non Blondes,** **Bigger, Better, Faster, More!**

* * *

The first thing he feels is his stomach rolling. He's not sure if he's hungry, or needing to throw up really, really badly. Most likely both.

The second thing he feels is his head splitting in half. With the throbbing of each of his heartbeats there is a lightning bolt of pain striking his skull, from behind one ear crossing around the back of his head to the other, pulsating with each pump of his heart.

The third, is how it feels like he's dying. Truly dying. His heart races as if it will give out at any moment, since it's currently at 109 beats per minute. To the average human, that rate would be the result of an arbitrary exercise regimen, a brisk stroll through the park if you will.  
However, being as the resting heartrate for the all-inclusive Megamind was clocked in at 36 beats per minute, it sure did feel like one hell of a heart attack.

He's having difficulty opening his eyes, feeling as if they've been glued shut somehow, and regardless of the strain he puts into it he feels his efforts are fruitless. They remain closed.

He listens intently, the gentle hum of electricity surging through the walls being the only familiar sound. He can feel the delicate caress of silk on his skin, the weight of a blanket or comforter pulled up to his chin and tucked underneath his right leg. His head feels to be at an elevated angle, his left leg hanging idly off the mattress with his booted foot planted firmly on the floor.

He racks his brain for any recollection of the previous night, any hint to his whereabouts or what led him to his current situation. Reaching up with nimble fingers the weight of gravity fights against his arm as he tries to feel his face, finally forcing his eyes open to view his surroundings.

There's an air of familiarity to the teal covers on the bed he's resting on, the lilac toned walls drawing nothing but a thoughtless blank from his mind. He turns his head as far as the angry little elf hammering away in his skull allows him to, coming face to face with a smiling whale shark on the pillow next to him.

He blinks for a few seconds, then decides to succumb to the welcoming call of deep slumber, letting his eyelids fall prey to the enticing lure of gravity when a booming _**WHAM**_ from behind him makes him lose all sense of security, snapping his head quickly towards the source of the sound that sends a fresh blooming pain across his field of vision.

"What in the unholy hell?" he mutters to himself as he slowly looks over his shoulder again, finding his Minion hunched over a gym bag while leaning into a wall at the edge of the room.

"Sorry Sir, didn't mean to wake you," his connate says with a sheepish smile.

"Oh, that's quite alright Minion," Megamind assures him with a faint smile, a wave of relief flooding through the piscean.

Then their faces turn quite the opposite.

"You didn't wake me so much as GAVE ME A GOD DAMN HEART ATTACK YOU NIT!" Megamind angrily proclaims, somehow finding the strength to yank the covers over his head dramatically.

After a few moments of strained silence, he kicks the sheets off to find he's still fully clothed besides his belt buckle and right boot missing, and in something he does _not_ recall having on when he left the lair last night.

"What the hell am I wearing?" he mutters to no one in particular, looking at the unfamiliar get up that's designed like most of his outfits except for the fact that there is _a lot_ of buckles and straps on this suit, the boot he still has on embellished with spikes and silver engravings and _what the holy shit are these flaps on my arms for?!_ he thinks to himself, lifting his arms and gazing at the fabric stretched from his wrists to his ribcage.

Puzzled through the fog in his mind, he moves his legs over the edge of the bed as gingerly as he can muster, lying flat on his back just a second longer before hoisting himself up off the bed and to the floor stand mirror nearby, Minion taking a few steps into the room to rest the gym bag on the mattress.

"You should rest Sir. You had, quite the long night yesterday," Minion says objectively, eyeing Megamind as he attempts to hobble painstakingly slow towards the mirror. A solid minute of hobbling and he hasn't moved any closer to the mirror, each step hindered by a crippling cramp through his calves and a hiss of pain from breathing in too deeply.

"Yeah, with all that drinking I'm surprised you even woke up! We were so worried about you Miss Ritchie decided to cut early and head here to her apartment instead of trying to make it back to the lair-"

"Wait, _her_ place? -" is all Megamind is able to interject when the sudden feeling of his ribs imploding on themselves sucks all the air out of his lungs.

Having reached the mirror he can finally assess the damage; heavy bags hang from underneath bloodshot eyes, a swelling bruise across his right temple that's stretched around the back of his head. He's pretty sure the ghost of dried blood on his lips and the crooked touch to his nose come from the same incident.

He tries to lean into the mirror to take a closer look but the stabbing pain in his side stops him with a halt, having him straighten out and reach lamely for the clasp opening resting on his neck.

After a few twitching struggles Minion steps behind his ward to help with lowering the zipper on his back, turning Megamind around to grab a hold of his suit by the wrists. The moment the suit arms slip off his elbows comes a flourish of glitter and cherry stems, as well as a drawn-out gasp from Minion eyeing his right side.

With a slow turn, he looks over his shoulder first as his body slowly rotates in the same direction; a tender purplish green bruise is spread across his right ribcage, from his waist all the way up to the edge of his pectoral.

"M-Minion. What the HELL in Hades name happened last night?" he asks calmly.  
Well, as calmly as his face can muster stoically.

Minion eyes him wearily, robotic fingers tapping together as he struggles to meet his glare with a wry smile.

"Well, Sir, it _was_ a pretty long night."

* * *

)-(

"Which! Nobody can de-ny!" Was sung loudly and _very_ clearly throughout the expanse of the French restaurant, a crowd of waiters and kitchen staff eagerly shifting around the corner booth to congratulate and give their best wishes to their blue defender before they cleared out the table and left the group to head to their stations.

Hiding behind his glass of wine with an embarrassed smile, Megamind fanned a hand towards Roxanne while a creeping blush bloomed on his cheeks. "You know you two didn't have to go through all this trouble for today," he said while lifting his glass to his lips and nervously re-arranging the table setting. Again.

"WHAT?" came simultaneously from across the table causing Megamind to cough into his drink. Good thing he didn't actually swallow yet.

"Honey, it's your _Birthday_ , of _course_ we're making a big deal out of it. And look, we even got you a few things," Roxanne said, nudging Minion to lift his arms from beneath the table.

From seemingly nowhere Minion raised his hands to reveal three gifts wrapped in silver foil and cerulean ribbon; a flat card the size of a check, a box smaller than his closed fist, and a sizeable cube Roxanne had to make room for on their table as to not push any of the dishes off onto the floor.

Megamind eagerly eyed the largest of the three, straining to keep his eyes from constantly attacking the box. He kept himself in a cool composure as he slyly reached for the card first, making slow deliberate movements to not make it obvious he was itching to tear apart all his gifts at once (not obvious, totally not, look, cool as a pickle).

The first one was a certificate from Minion to the outlet store in Romania that Megamind still received basic supplies and equipment from for research purposes.

Yeah, strictly research.

With a soft "thank you" to Minion, he blindly reached for the large box next only to have Roxanne shove the smaller one into his open hand, drawing a scowl from Megamind and a smug grin from her.

Leaning into the booth with an exaggerated pout, he delicately pulled the ribbon and foil to reveal a cardboard box decorated with the familiar Starfleet insignia.

Giving the rest of the foil a quick yank, he turned over the box to find a peek in window, allowing him to see the inside holding a small tumbler glass, just big enough to hold a few sips of a drink.

The U.S.S. Enterprise was decorating one side, and on the other a still shot of Kirk with one hand raised over his head took up the entirety of the glass, "Beam me up, Scotty!" lettered underneath the picture.

"I thought you'd get a kick out of it, otherwise I would've kept it for myself," Roxanne said with a smile.

"You know Kirk never said that in any of the episodes, right?" Megamind asked with his own smile, and she responded with a giggling nod, "Yeah, and Vader never said 'Luke'."

"That's a dirty lie and you know it!" Megamind cut in with an accusing finger towards her, both holding their breath before letting out dual bellows of laughter.

Momentarily distracted, Megamind perked back up at the sight of the large gift being slowly pushed towards his side of the table, almost bouncing out of his seat from excitement himself. The moment the box reached his grasp he tore into the wrapper and flipped the flaps of the non-descriptive cardboard box.

His face stilled when he peered inside, his lips forming a small "oh" as he slowed his movements while staring into the contents.

Both Roxanne and Minion had a hard time deciphering if his pasted smile was from sheer over excitement or dejection. She had a strained smile herself, flickering her eyes towards Minion who seemed to be sharing her same thoughts, if his cloned smile of hers was anything to go by.

Roxanne spoke from the corner of her mouth, reaching a hand out towards Megamind's arm. "Megamind? Honey, you okay? If, if you don't like it-"

"Like it? How," he whispered, jumping up suddenly as he yanked out the contents high in the air and raising his voice a few volumes startling their half of the restaurant, Roxanne snapping her hand back in a blink of surprise.

"ILOVEITHOW'DYOUKNOW ohmyword-" and he ran off towards the direction of the restrooms, Minion jumping in a quick, "Sir! Don't forget your boots!"

"THERE'S BOOTS?!" Megamind continued to speak as far from an inside voice one could get while at a candlelit dinner.

He leaned over the box and pulled out a pair of leather platform boots, straps and buckles that went well beyond the knees that accompanied the suit he had draped over his arms. He ran off with a blur of silvers and blues over leather to the men's room, nearly knocking over a maître d' along the way.

Roxanne turned to Minion with an amused look of disbelief, both of them glad from the sudden reaction to the gift.

"I think he likes it," she said with a smile, Minion replying "Of course he does. He might have an opinion or two to share about their "music", but when it comes to showmanship no one has better stage presence than KISS. I just hope he doesn't mind the-"

"IT HAS WINGS TOO!" Suddenly came from the opposite end of the building, assumptions leaning towards the restrooms.

"Yeah, I don't think he minds," said Roxanne, smiling into her glass of wine.

* * *

)-(

"I remember _that_ much, it's what happened afterwards I'm lost about."

"Well," Minion works up, his fingers tapping restlessly against each other.

"Remember how we stopped by Fry's that one time for the fiber optic cables? And you got to talking with Mike?"

Taking the lack of response from Megamind as a queue to keep going, Minion does. "And he mentioned bar hopping, and you said you always wanted to head to Pub Fiction and he mentioned how a friend of his works there-"

"Minion. Get to the _point_."

Minion coughs nervously, his arms swinging by his sides.

"Well…"

* * *

)-(

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" came from nearly every corner of the pub as hands holding glasses that were raised in the air were brought down to meet lips, Megamind placing his glass down sharply on the wooden table with a lopsided smile as the group he was with each gave him their own form of congratulations.

"Sir, you sure you don't want to, slow down? You seem to be taking an awful lot of those so closely together…"

"Nonsense my dear filet mignon! These creamy little concoctions don't mean any harm!" Megamind rebutted with a shake of the little glass tumbler, knocking it over to roll around the surface when failing to set it down properly.

"Minion is right, Megs. Just because you can't taste it doesn't mean the alcohol isn't there," Roxanne warned while gazing over the sea of glasses already accumulated on the table.

"How, many of those are yours anyway?"

With a gaze of intense focus he shot his arm out towards the table, dividing the score of glasses sloppily in half and pulling the ending result towards himself.

"You drank THAT many already? HOW? We LITERALLY just walked in, not even ten minutes ago!"

"That's our bad, ma'am, we each promised him a round for his birthday," responded the man closest to Megamind, fidgeting with the end of his Star Wars shirt.

Megamind clapped him on the shoulder, bringing him in with a sideways hug while fanning Roxanne off with a weak wrist.  
"No apologies Mike, 's no big deal. These little thingies aren't so bad, the-, what'd you say they're called?"

A mop-haired guy next to Mike replied with an adjustment of his glasses, "I believe they're called 'buttery nipples' mister Megamind, Sir."

In mid nod of agreement, he stopped with a sudden look of shock and flung his arms over his chest as his hands cupped his pectorals, a stricken look of shock and offense stretched across his face.

"Why, I have never!"

Roxanne smacked his hands from his chest with a roll of her eyes. "Just keep yourself situated while I get us some water, will you?"

He shifted on his feet, dropping to the seat under him with a pout. "You're just jealous because he didn't compliment _your_ nipples."

The smile she was biting back burst into a wide grin as she lightly tapped the back of her hand once over Minion's furry shoulder, he himself distracted by a comic held face high. Which of course ended up being slapped at light speed across the table's surface.

"Keep an eye on him for me?"

"Of course Miss Ritchie," he assured her with a smile, turning his attention to his ward, who was stacking the shot glasses into various pyramids.

With a lighthearted sigh, he rolled his eyes away from Sir towards the group that welcomed them to the bar, all of which were lead in by Mike.

"Thanks again for bringing us out tonight. I, know Sir can be a handful, so apologies ahe-"

"No! No-no, the thanks is ours, please!" Mike cut in with an eager wave of his hand.

"I mean, it's not every day we get to celebrate our defender's birthday!" he continued as the group nodded in simultaneous agreement, everyone turning to face Megamind, who was laughing at a knocked over pyramid.

"Although, we should probably be apologizing to _you_. I didn't realize the alcohol would get to him so fast-"

"Nah, it's no big deal. These shots are weaker than wine when it comes to the A.B.V. What gets him is the sugar."

A sharp stream of clinking sounds made everyone turn to Megamind who was stacking and unstacking the shot glasses in various patterns and heights, ending with four stacks of three glasses and slapping both palms on the tabletop as he shouted "Time!".

"Sir, no one's keeping time," Minion pointed out lamely.

Megamind had a dazed look of surprise as he returned his attention to the glasses.

"Sometimes his body doesn't know what to do with all that energy. It gets a little hard to keep track of him buzzed _and_ hyped up."

A tap of his glass returned his attention back to Sir, sitting at the edge of the table with his arms crossed flatly against his chest.

"I'm bored."

"Here," the alien fish responded with a toss of the comic book towards his partners blue hands. "Read this."

Satisfied with Sir distracted on trying to figure out which way was up, he turned back to his four hosts sitting across from him clustered on the other end of the square table. The smallest of the group, a young woman with a grape colored pixie cut (who from introduction Minion found out was the one who worked there), laughed at the sight and turned to Mike.

"Reminds me of the time Georgie boy here got too giddy on the tequila," she cajoled with an elbow towards the mop-haired gentleman between them, the man (Minion assumed was Georgie) blushing a furious scarlet.

"Which one?" Mike replied with an elbow into Georgie's other side, the group laughing together when a loud slap of paper against the table top drew their attention back to Megamind.

"Done."

Trying to buy more time for distraction, Minion placed the comic back into Sir's hands, looking around eagerly before eyeing a shelf a couple of tables behind them lining the entirety of the bar's wall. "Why don't you, see if there's anything else up for grabs over there? I heard a rumor they have a first edition of Fantastic Four somewhere in there."

Minion breathed a sigh of relief when Sir's eyes lit up with excitement.

"You mean the one where they fight the Mole Man? Why didn't you say so earlier!" The smaller alien said as he sprinted towards the comic shelf, going through each sleeve and taking in the contents of each magazine in a matter of seconds.

"Well shit," laughed the purple haired woman, "he's practically inhaling those books."

"Yeah-, he can scan a page at 25 hundred words a minute. And that's when he's _not_ on a sugar high."

"Yeah, no, George fell of an electric bull before they even turned it on," Mike replied, drawing more laughter from the group.

From across the table sat a man with a clean-shaven head and a soft brown goatee, quick to point out, "Hey, don't blame him, he's not the fastest in the league sober either. Took him a while before he realized checkers and chess are _not_ the same game."

"You're one to talk, Cruz, we had to go three rounds of one-on-one before we could end the game right because you kept misspelling H.O.R.S.E." George rebutted, Mike raising his hand to share a high-five.

From behind Cruz came Roxanne balancing six glasses of iced water in her arms, swiftly placing them down on the table without a spill.

"Well Miss Ritchie, you sure do have a talent for a balancing act," Minion couldn't help to say with surprise.

"Yep. A year of waiting tables forces you to learn how to utilize body parts you never knew you could balance things on."

"Wait, you _waitressed_? I don't recall ever seeing that in any of your files," responded Minion in disbelief.

Roxanne simply shrugged her shoulder. "Kept it off the books, back when I was struggling to make ends meet while in school. Not easy interning without any income, y'know? Boss thought it would be easier on both of us to keep it under the table, out of sight out of mind."

"Speaking of which," she muttered, eyeing everyone around the table, starting and ending with Minion before taking a glance underneath the table.

"Minion. Where's, Megamind?"

The pisceans face fell as he swam around in his bowl to look behind the suit, everyone else moving in their seats to shoot a rapid glace at the empty spot where Sir had been mere moments before rampaging through the book shelf. All that remained were piles of graphics and paperbacks stacked in various neat piles on the floor.

"Fish sticks."

"Trish, why didn't you say anything?" Mike called out offensively.

"Me?!" she exclaimed, raising a finger towards Cruz. "If anything it's _his_ fault, he's got clear view of the shelf!".

Cruz held a distant gaze over everyone's head, blinking out of his blank expression with a "Huh?".

"Just, come on," groaned Trish, standing with a shove of her chair as everyone followed suit, Roxanne long gone into the maze of Tv's and arcade machines that took over the other half of the building.

It didn't take long for them to track down the only blue man in a full leather-and-metal outfit. All they had to do was follow the steady smacking of plastic buttons accompanied by the occasional _thwump_.

Turning around the corner of a Galaga machine, the group found their defender hunched over a game of Stacker, punching down the machines button to stack the boxes faster than the computer could process its "woo-hoo!" sound efficiently as he made his way to the top flawlessly. He stared at the screen intently with unbroken focus as his mouth worked around a twizzler hanging from his lips.

They weren't staring at his seamless stride at pulling yet another top tier prize, it was the fact that the unused pool table behind him was already littered with claimed prizes from the machine, which was now well on its way of being emptied out.

He let out a satisfied grunt as something from one of the top prize prongs dropped to the claim box, bending over to reach through the receiving flap and turning around with a smug grin plastered across his face when he looked up to see Roxanne and the group standing right behind him. His girlfriend and brother with not-so-entertained expressions on their faces.

He clutched the blue prize (of course) tightly to his chest, his grin dropping faster than the twizzler could meet the floor. "Megamind," she said sternly, eyeing the prizes on the pool table everyone else already seemed to be combing through before turning her attention back to him.

"What, what're you doing?"

He shifted nervously from one foot to the other, his fingers working on the soft felt of whatever it was in his hands while his eyes darted everywhere but to her. Shooting his arms out towards her he held the plush item at eye level where she could finally see it was a teddy be-

"A, whale shark?" she asked.

He nodded eagerly and turned it over in his hands so she could see the other side, a hard plastic covering its back with star cutouts in the molding itself.

"I know you think sharks are cute, and this one doubles as a night light by shining stars on the ceiling, and I thought of you because you like to sleep with the bathroom light on, and-" he stopped himself short, lowering his eyes to stare at their feet.

She took the plush in both hands gently, leaning over to place a kiss on his ridiculously considerate nose.

"Love, we're supposed to out here celebrating your birthday, it's supposed to be about _you_. You shouldn't be giving _me_ gifts."

She stepped aside between him and Minion, looking over the mess their group was making out of the cheap electronics, plushes and nickel toys strewn across the green velvet.

"And why is the pool table covered in those?"

He laughed nervously, an index finger working an itch on his chin.

"Eh, heh, ah. They were in the way."

She rolled her eyes away from him and towards the shark in her arms as he went off. "But you wouldn't know how surprisingly easy it was to get them all! I mean, _sure_ there's a glitch where only after every fifth play does _ALL_ the lights come on but all you have to do is give it a kick for every third button press and why are you laughing?" he stopped to ask with a confused frown, Roxanne smiling into the plush with a restrained giggle.

"Nothing, nothing, just. You."

He still held his head with a tilt as she ran her hand over his head with an affectionate rub, dropping her arm over his shoulders.

"Let's figure out what to do with this mess, and _then_ we're getting you water, mister."

* * *

)-(

"That doesn't seem so bad," Megamind says with a shrug, sitting on the edge of the bed with a towel underneath him to catch the stray debris he shook off.

"And then we got kicked out," Minion says blatantly.

With a coughed snort, Megamind looks up to him with a dubious squint.

"What, are you talking about, how?!"

* * *

)-(

"Getting a little timid here. I'm aching to start a fight with some jocks, you guys in for a last round?" Mike mentioned as everyone finished the last of their drinks and waters.

They stood from the table and walked to the bar to close off their separate tabs, each taking turns arguing who got to cover which tab and no one really paying any mind to the guest of honor.

Until a bubbling mess of hot foam started creeping over the bar and everyone turned towards the evil genius laughing besides them while holding a set of display beakers foaming over everywhere.

"Nobody light a match. This stuff is flammable," is all he said through fits of giggles.

* * *

)-(

"Well shit. Do we owe them for any damages?" Megamind asks with an apologetic smile.

Minion quickly waves a hand, attempting to fan away Sir's worries. "The guy was incredibly cool about it, I mean I know it _was_ tempting for you to resist the miniature chemistry set they had on display on the counter. Although he couldn't figure out why they had thirty volume developer and yeast at the bar, something about how Trish needs to stop doing her hair in the back on her days off and another waiter of theirs sometimes tries to make bread. Tries."

Megamind has a blank "oh" of understanding, his head nodding limply.

"There wasn't any damage done really, but the guy said kicking you out was more of a show. He figured we didn't want to be around when the cops showed up, since someone called them. Which was considerate of him considering what happened at the next place."

"What happened at the next place?" Megamind questions with a frown.

* * *

)-(

"Alright, who do I get to apricot first?" Megamind declared when his feet landed inside the bar doors, fists rolling in a sloppy Popeye stance.

The group of geeks shifted on their feet uncomfortably, Cruz breaking out in a whistle suddenly interested in the brick wall, Mike rubbing a hand behind his neck as he spoke out.

"Megamind? I was joking about the whole, 'starting a fight' thing. It's an inside joke, a code we use when we want to head out to a sports bar."

Looking deflated, Megamind nodded his head in understanding, lowering his fists to his side. "So, just a code between you guys? No fighting?"

"No fighting," he assured.

Megamind looked minutely upset, but soon sprung back with a smile. "Hey, at least we don't have to deal with any dunderheads while we're here."

The group seemed to visibly sigh in relief as a whole, Mike giving a smiling nod himself as he pat Megamind on the shoulder and took the group in to their seats.

Megamind smiled as they passed by, leaning his head back to direct a whisper over towards his brother.

"Minion. Why didn't they say 'code' when declaring the order to come here?"

"Sir, I believe it's in their secret language to not mention 'code'".

"But that's preposterous. How would they know it's code?" Megamind questioned, raising his hands and arms up in an overdramatized shrug as they followed behind the others.

Having settled around a standing table with their drinks in hand (Megamind being denied any alcohol and instead settling on a Shirley temple with the condition that it included a speared cherry), they were well in the middle of a Jenga game George had found off on the side, a round of truth or dare stamped on each brick distracting them.

Cruz was sitting on Mike's lap for the round, and Megamind had attempted to blow a raspberry on Minion's gorilla suit when Roxanne knocked over the stack with her pull, ending the game with a crash and laughter from the table.

She stood to head to the bar and close off what they had left opened when Minion gently placed his hand over her shoulder to stop her.

"I'll go on and check the tab, after the way I ended up losing him in the last place it might be best you just wait here with Sir," he clarified with a small smile as he walked away towards the registers.

After a few minutes of waiting on the bartender and finally having closed their tab, the sound of shouting and a smashed glass made Minion turn around in time to see someone do a somersault over a table and Sir take a shot from a drink before throwing the glass towards a group of men surrounding him, body slamming into one of them as the others joined in his defense.

His hands flying to grip his dome in a panic, he couldn't help but gape at the chaotic mess; bodies flying over one another as Trish threw a stray punch connecting with the jaw of one of the men in a jersey and Cruz clearing a table with another.

"I was gone for just two minutes! LITERALLY two!"

After a few people (but mainly Minion) pulled the fighters apart and the group rejoined at the entrance, Mike tried to clarify what happened as they pulled on their jackets to head out into the winter evening once more.

"Some guy bumped into Megamind and knocked over his drink. He was upset he dropped his cherry before he could take a bite out of it, demanded the jock buy another. One thing led to another, insults were tossed around and-"

"CHEESE IT!" Megamind yelled while running through the group and bursting out the front door, a slow growing growl from a crowd behind them rushing them to put their coats on faster and bolting out through the door after him.

-  
They walked along the streets towards the next place they had in mind, Cruz mentioning the open mic and small stage set up in the underground bar would make it a fun deal. It wasn't until they rounded a corner did someone turn back to gaze over the group and did a double take behind them.

"Wha-, where the hell did he get that?!" Trish exclaimed with a raised finger.

Everyone turning behind to look at whoever was in the back noticed Megamind walking up to them with a surplus sized jar of maraschino cherries held in one arm, the other taking a bite of a cherry and popping the stray stem into his suit.

"What the hell, where did you get that? Did you, DID YOU TAKE IT FROM THE BAR?" Exclaimed Roxanne with a frantic wave of her free arm that wasn't tucked into herself for warmth.

"Sir, why are you putting the cherry stems into your suit?" Minion asked with curiosity.

Clearing out his red dye stained mouth from the other cherries he had quickly popped in, he tucked the stems into the slip of his neck and eyed them all with confusion, as if the answer was clear enough.

"I don't wanna leave a trail for th' bartender t' follow us, 'f course."

* * *

)-(

Megamind slits his eyes towards Minion, his mouth strained in a small puckered pout while he holds an outstretched hand towards his direction as a silent question.

"I dunno Sir, drunk logic?" Minion shrugs.

* * *

)-(

They had fought with Megamind to get rid of the rest of the cherries, seeing as the bouncer at the next bar wouldn't let them in with the jar, as well as they didn't want him reaching his peak sugar high again.

Once inside the group had separated in different directions, Cruz leading way towards the stage to make a selection over who got to sing next, Mike and George heading to the bar and Minion standing beside Roxanne at a table not far from everyone else, Megamind pouting frustratingly the entire time.

Over on the small makeshift stage that took up a corner of the bar stood Trish flubbing a few bars of "I love rock and roll" as a few people stood around to watch the spectacle, clapping along to the rhythm and swaying loosely into each other.

Back by the table Roxanne and Minion couldn't help but stare at Megamind, concerned looks on their faces as they both noticed his odd behavior once the singing started.

He was muttering to himself, arms crossed and one hand fisted over his mouth as he continued his one sided conversation no one else could hear.

"Sir?"

"Honey, what's wro-"

And without warning he tucked into himself, dropping immediately to the glossy (and not very clean looking bar floor) as he started rolling around the floor with a look of determination.

"Megs, no, stop it, honey get, get up, what-are-you-even," Roxanne begs, hands held out to her sides palm up. She bites back a laugh as she watches her boyfriend roll around the bar floor, not sure of what the hell was in that last drink he shot.

"Megamind! What. Are. You. Do-ing?" She asks sternly, trying her dammest not to give in to his goof.

He stopped abruptly on his side, looked over his shoulder towards her feigning innocence as he calmly replied "I'm doing rock and roll."

She deadpanned him, her hands still held out to her sides as she dropped one to her waist and raised the other to pinch the bridge of her nose, not being able to control the rolling laughter bubbling up her chest.

Megamind looked as confused as ever, standing up and dusting himself off as he marched towards the bar, Roxanne folding over herself as tears blurred her vision.

Following closely behind, Minion hovered over Megamind briefly while turning over in his suit to make sure Miss Ritchie was okay behind them, stray claps here and there filling in the noise of the bar as Trish had finished up the last of the lyrics with a leg split.

Or an attempt of one, by the looks of the face she made.

Minion turned back in time to see Megamind gulp a beverage down and reach eagerly for the spare microphone next.

* * *

)-(

"Wait. Stop right there. Minion, are you telling me that I sang? Karaoke? As in, I actually grabbed the mike and sang from the bar-"

"Actually Sir, you got on stage."

"…You're SHITTING me."

"Uh, no, Sir? I'm pretty sure that's physiologically impossible-"

"Minion, I could NOT have been that drunk to walk away from the bar and perform in front of an audience!"

"Sir, you were so drunk you started booing yourself after messing up the first three lines of 'Don't Stop Believing' and by then Miss Ritchie and I were over each other trying to get you down."

Megamind holds a fisted hand to his mouth, tight with disbelief.

"Journey?" he whispers, hoping against hope he heard Minion wrong.

Minion dead eyes him with a solemn nod, making him throw his hands in the air with a yelp of denial.

"Yes! Of course! And then?!" he asks, waiting for Minion to list any other disturbances he might've caused for the night.

"Well, while we were passing underneath a Marquee you thought it hilarious to change the sign to 'whale baculum'. No one got it except for George, who so happens to be a Marine Biologist."

Megamind snorts with a chuckle, biting back a grin.

"You also somehow disappeared into a ball-pit at another club, I have no idea who thought it would be smart to have a ball-pit of all things near alcohol. We pulled you out as you pummeled us with plastic balls, and no one really knew how you got your hands on eyeliner."

"I wasn't done up by then? I'm surprised I went that long without it," Megamind said dismissively, pulling his pinkie along the inside of his tear duct to clear it.

"I mean everything was going well," Minion continued. "Until you tried to prove to someone you could play darts without looking."

"Because I can," Megamind states with his eyebrows furrowed as he drops his hand and ever so slightly raises his nose in the air. "What's wrong with that?"

* * *

)-(

"Megamind you can't cover your eyes with your hand while playing darts," Roxanne griped while he balanced a dart by its needle on his finger.

"Sure I can, watch."

He tossed the dart in the air, making a swift catch and throwing in full speed towards a cork board across the bar, one hand planted firmly over his eyes the entire time.

"YOOOOO," someone yelled out from behind them, a lone pumping fist raised in the sea of heads the only thing they could see from the person.

"Do, do that again!" the slurring voice cheered with a sluggish wave, making Megamind smile with all the confidence his drinks have given him.

With a cocky grin, he proceeded to lift his hand again to cover his eyes, Roxanne slapping the other hand as he tried to grasp for another dart. With grunts and pouts he managed to snag another metal and plastic needle to throw towards the board, this one landing much closer to the center bullseye.

Catching the attention of a few passerby's, he continued his performance of showmanship with multiple darts and various methods of blinding himself, one after another the darts seamlessly reaching the end target.

That is, until the owner of the lone fist clapped Megamind on his shoulder just as he was in mid throw with the latest dart, making a clean path towards their group standing against the wall and planting firmly into one of their knees.

Over the hollering their friend was giving out, everyone around Megamind stared in disbelieving horror as the fist pumping instigator leaned into his ear to whisper "Double or nothing says you can't do that again."

And Megamind responded with a sly smile and a twirl of the next dart in his hand.

* * *

)-(

Palm planted firmly on his face, he mutters around his hand, "So then?"

"Well," Minion looks off to the side, his fingers never ceasing their tap dance, "You proved that kid wrong, but George didn't want to hang out with us anymore after having a second dart lodged into his knee."

Megamind drags his hand down his face, pulling eyelids and both cheeks along when he stops midway with a thoughtful pause.

"That was George? I thought George was the one with the shaved head?"

"No no, that's Cruz. George had the glasses and the moppy hair."

"I thought that was Mike."

"Mike had glasses too, but also had the R2-D2 shirt- Wait, no, besides the point, you stabbed Mike's friend. Twice. You better find yourself lucky they had all claimed it was the best night ever just moments before."

Megamind slits his eyes with doubt.

"Why?"

"Well. We, uh, were about to leave a dance-club in lower midtown when you walked by a confetti cannon. They were getting them prepped up for New Year's. You thought it was for your birthday," Minion clarified with a sheepish grin.

"There was glitter and balloons everywhere."

Megamind simply nodded in understanding, connecting the dots to where the glittery mess inside his suit had spontaneously appeared from.

He rested himself on the edge of the bed to secure a grip on the remaining boot, struggling to give it a yank off with half of the buckles still tightly strapped. Giving a forcible yank he threw it carelessly over shoulder and stared at his exposed feet with contemplation.

"What, happened to my other boot?"

* * *

)-(

"Minion, he's starting to become dead weight and I'm not sure if it's on purpose," Roxanne groaned with the struggle of keeping a sagging Megamind from dragging more than just his feet across the pavement.

"We should be heading back to the Lair and get him into bed soon," Minion voiced with worriment as he looked around the emptying streets. "What time is it?" he asked.

Roxanne lifted Megamind's dead arm to look at his watch, dropping it back on his side with a limp. "Time to get his sorry butt out of the cold. Minion, can you, ngh, take him while I try to get us a taxi? I have no idea where he's getting the extra weight from."

Motioning with his open arms to take over Megamind's limp body, Roxanne walked over to the curb as Minion held the blue man up in a standing position, bringing him back into consciousness without the notice from _either_ of his caretakers.

Roxanne backed from the approaching vehicle and leaned into the window to speak with the cabbie, when the back passenger door flew open to Megamind trying to scramble into the back seat.

Startled, the cab driver sped off into the downtown grid as Megamind ran behind it, stumbling to a stop and struggling to take off his right platform boot.

"Racist!" He yelled, chunking the boot as far into the night as he could before taking off running after it again, having his ward and girlfriend trail after him once more.

* * *

)-(

"I, vaguely remember hot-dogs somewhere in there. Was that before or after?" Megamind asks through the open bathroom door, warm water running as he scrubs furiously at the glittery foam refusing to dislodge from underneath his nails.

* * *

)-(

Hobbling up to a lone hot-dog vendor with a limp Megamind being dragged by Minions arms, Roxanne fumbled through her purse to get enough change for a few franks.

"Oh, _that's_ where he got the eyeliner from," she muttered to herself. "How the hell...?"

Minion was startled to a jolt when Megamind's body jerked forward in an attempt to faceplant the pavement and the poor ichthyoid raced against his instincts to hold him in place.

"I, believe that he's had one too many, ma'am," the middle-aged man said behind the steam well of the cart as Roxanne handed over the mess of cash she managed to fish out of her purse.

"Yeah, and I believe you're correct," she replied with a slight, thanking him for stating the obvious.

"I BELIEVE I CAN FLY!" Megamind suddenly shouted loud enough to startle everyone to a jump and Minion to let go of him slightly through mental shock, the blue man lunging forward to a bank of snow they stood next to and landing face first into the frozen pile of water with a soft _crunch_ of ice against ice.

With an inward sigh, Roxanne turned her attention back to the cart man and asked Minion to "go make sure he's okay."

A few shuffling steps forward and Megamind started to give a few struggled and weak attempts to move his limbs to create a snow angel, muffled sounds that sounded like singing coming from his face buried into the frost.

"Doe thof, eh meee wen. Ho don oo ah eeyay-yeah."

Minion lifted Megamind who was in the middle of giving a swaying jerk with his limbs and butt in an attempt to dance in the air as his singing slowly turned into hollering, his eyes remaining closed the entire time.

"Streetlight, peoplOH-AH-OOOWOAAAAAH!"

Standing behind the gorilla robot suit holding the singing alien up in mid-air, Roxanne took another deep breath with a slow head shake, arms full of foil wrapped hot-dogs.

* * *

)-(

"That was before, because we couldn't keep up with you until you slipped on a patch of ice and landed on your face. Then we agreed to get some food after spotting it just around the corner," Minion replies. "Consider yourself lucky the group had split before then, otherwise you'd never hear the end about your fascination with Journey. Hearing it once out of you was enough."

Having cleared himself of most of the glittery mess and combed through for any stray cherry stems, he shakes himself out of his birthday suit, the leather one, and makes his way sluggishly towards the gym bag propped on the bed in search for fresh clothing.

He has to stop for a moment, since the stabbing pain is back on his side like a stuck splinter.

"Okay," he breathes, turning to face Minion as he sits on the mattress to ease the pain.

"What was the grand finale?"

Minion's eyes dart from his brothers to the blooming bruise on his torso, and back up to meet his eyes.

"How do I put this gently-"

* * *

)-(

"Where. Is. HE."

Elbowing her way through a crowd inside a balcony bar, Roxanne raged with fuming anger.

"I knew we should've followed him in, 'I need to pee' my ass, when I get my hands on his skinny neck-"

They burst through the trickle of people milling around on the inside, multiple levels dedicated to outdoor seating and even through the horrid winter blizzard there was still patrons sitting out underneath heating lamps.

Which is where they heard the chanting coming from.

"-lord, o-ver-lord, o-ver-lord-"

"No, nonono what is he up to NO," Roxanne rushed through people standing shoulder to shoulder blocking the French doors, eager to join the chanting outside.

Making way through the doors she scanned the patio in hopes to eye her blue idiot of a boyfriend, but no such luck to find the leather and metal dressed alien.

Both she and Minion did however notice everyone staring up to the roof, pointing and cheering on to whatever was going on behind them, and they were terrified of turning around.

Up there through the snow fall and the strings of patio lights they saw Megamind standing on the edge, one of the light strings gripped firmly in one hand and the other waving eagerly to the awaiting crowd below him when he spotted them and pointed down with barely restrained excitement.

"Hey, hehehey! There, so-see th-at, th'rs Minion, th' mos fan-tatical fish any dominering ov'r lord could as for. 'N there, th'rs my girl-fren, the fabulous Rossane Ritchie, th' mos amazin' woman 'n th' worl'."

"Shit," they both muttered, realizing someone had given him more alcohol by the time they had found him.

"Honey," Roxanne called out with worry, "However you got yourself up there, could you please come down the same way?"

"Don' worry Rossane, deese wing thingies shul give me 'nough resist'nce to glide righ ov'r da crowd,"

"No, Megamind, sweetheart that's not what they're meant for-"

"Sir, could you please-"

"I'm coming down!" Megamind called out, firming his grip with both hands on the string of lights before adjusting his footing on the edge of the roof.

"Megamind NO!"

"SIR!"

"BEAM ME UP, SCOTTY!" He called out one last time, giving a crouched jump to his guardian's horror down below and leaping off the roof.

They both held their breath as they watched him reach the end of the string and using the full momentum carried himself to the railing at the end of the patio they stood on.

Both Roxanne and Minion nearly died when his feet planted firmly on the guardrail and he turned around with an elaborate swing of his free arm, balancing on the thin bar and continuing to show off by bowing deeply in their direction.

"Minion we have to get him before he hurts himself. Again," Roxanne said as she started to make way towards the end of the patio.

One hand gripping firmly on the string lights, the other pumping up and down furiously, his face was turned away from the cheering crowd when someone shouted out "GIVE THAT MAN A BEER!". He turned towards the voice, letting go of the string of lights and raising his hand in expectation of a drink.

Instead an unopened can of beer was lobbed from the other direction, straight into his right temple, making him loose his balance.

And Megamind tipped over backwards, fate making sure his ribs hit every railing on the way down.

* * *

)-(

"And then we hauled your unconscious body back here."

Dragging his hands down his face (seeming to be his favorite show of frustration), Megamind is joking when he asks, "And that wasn't the end of it, was it?"

Minion isn't when he responds "You leaned over Miss Ritchie's banister and threw up all over the kitchen."

Megamind turns around, hands still on his face, a look of unbelieving horror.

"No."

"Yes."

"NO."

"YES," Minion assures him sternly, motioning with his head rolling towards the rail for his hungover brother to take a look himself.

Megamind's hands never leave his face when he finally leans over the railing; in fact they curl themselves over his mouth to hold back the shock and disappointment in himself.

"You missed a spot," is all he's able to whisper after finding his voice, Minion joining him to look over the banister and seeing the area his arms did not reach when giving a wipe-down.

"Darn."

Hand inching away from his mouth towards his forehead, he tries to massage the night away while muttering "I'm never drinking again" under his breath.

"But Sir, you need to at least take in some water every once in a while," Minion says with apprehension, and for a second Megamind can't tell if he's being sarcastic or not, eyeing him with a squint under his massaging hand.

They hear the footsteps come up before they can mentally prepare themselves for the backlash they both will soon be receiving. Even Minion is in the middle of reeling into the protection of his suit when he remembers _he's_ not the one that threw up everywhere last night.

That still doesn't make it any less scary that she's on her way up.

Before Megamind can make it to the safety of the bedcovers, Roxanne kicks the door open. Her face is knotted and huffed at first, until she smiles apologetically towards Minion and asks for help with the tray of food she's struggling to carry in both hands.

Both men don't make their tense confusion be known right away, wary of her eventually snapping at either of them at any given moment.

Minion helps Roxanne by placing the tray on her vanity, nearly clearing the table in the process with the amount of panicked anxiety coursing through his small body. Freed from the tray she gives her hands a little stretch and turns to Megamind standing in the middle of the bedroom, her face breaking out into a soft smile and shoulders dropping with relief.

"Thank god you're okay."

Megamind lets out a little peep of confused fear, for it's not necessarily the reaction he was expecting from her, especially not the way she's rushing towards him with open arms to envelope him in a tight embrace.

"I, am. Yes. Completely-, fine?"

"You sure? You took some damn falls a few times last night, we were almost afraid of letting you go to sleep."

"It wasn't much, I've been in worse situations before," he assured her with a tight smile. "But I don't think I got enough sleep, although I should probably eat as well. The memories of what happened last night are still a little, hard of putting together."

"Well just make sure to get some rest, okay sweetheart?" she nearly begs with the same sugary sweet tone, her hands hovering in want to caress his face but afraid she will further any injuries and bruising, settling on giving him a quick peck on his uninjured cheek.

Widened eyes following Roxanne walk out of the bedroom door, Megamind gapes at the doorframe his girlfriend just walked back through.

"Minion?" he squeaks. "What, _exactly_ , happened last night? After you got back?"

Minion can't seem to pick his jaw up high enough to mouth his wording correctly.

"Honestly Sir, I have no idea. She wouldn't say much after I arrived with your things, just seemed to be focused on cleaning up and getting a meal put together. I'll, be downstairs getting everything else in order, you should eat and get some more rest."

Minion gives Megamind another firm nod of his head before disappearing through the bedroom door leaving behind his confused (and struggling to be sober) brother.

He settles on the vanity chair and blankly stares at the alphabet soup floating nonsensical gibberish, almost mocking him for his inability to recall the happenings of last night.

Letting out a deep sigh he's been holding back for too long, he gives in to the tempting scent the soup carries over, letting his blanking thoughts pass with the assumption whatever he did last night to pacify Roxanne was probably for the best anyway.

* * *

)-(

 _.last night._

"I'll be back momentarily, Miss Ritchie!" Minion bellowed from the living room, followed by the sound of the front door closing.

Roxanne turned to the sleeping mound of leather and limbs splayed over the collection of plushies that took over her side of the bed, gentle breathing and fluttering of eyelashes a contrasting vision in sight of their chaotic night.

"What am I going to do with you?" she muttered to herself with a smile as she leaned over him once more.

She drew the covers of her bed back to allow space for Megamind, adjusting the pillow underneath his slumbering head. Moving his limp body in place she pulled at his waist to un-do the belt holding his suit together, getting it halfway off before Megamind snapped awake and startled Roxanne by fighting with her, his hands clutching at her wrists as she struggled to get his belt off.

"Megs, urgh, Meg-Megamind. MEGAMIND. I, honey I have to, get. This. Off-…" she uttered between grunts and spasms while fighting his feeble attempts to stop her from undressing him between his own whines and cries of refusal.

"Stop, don't-no, please-"

"Megamind I need to-"

"You don't understand-"

"Sweetheart I know it's been a long night but-"

"I can't just take it off-"

"I can help you if you just-"

"I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND!" he yelled.

"…what?" Roxanne asked, her hands holding the belt in mid-air as Megamind curled into a tight ball at the head of the bed's baseboard.

"I understand it might be hard to resist my, incredibly-handsome-and-devilish-charm but I do say your feminine wiles will not, _tempt_ me, to indulge in the path of unfaithfulness," he rushed as he scrambled to hide behind one of the many stuffed animals littered across her bed.

Her hand held his belt well over her head, her eyes looking everywhere before settling on his hands shielding his curled neck.

"Megamind?" she asked softly, lowering her hand to place the belt gently on the bedside table so as to not startle him. Her hands hovered with open palms over the covers, waiting for Megamind to lift his eyes and take a good look at her. Only when he did, did she move her hands to grasp the blanket and motion for him to straighten himself out.

"I'm not gonna do anything you don't want me to, but right now I need you to lay down for me, okay? It's been, one _hell_ of a night and you need to rest so all I'm gonna do is pull this blanket back for you to get in, alright? Just lay on your back and put this leg down off the bed for me," she said, tapping his left knee lightly.

He eyed her with caution, his leg moving agonizingly slow for she knew he was testing her patience, if only to see what she _really_ was up to. Not giving in to any amount of frustration, she gingerly slid the comforter over the rest of his body up to his neck, reaching behind his head to adjust the pillows and making sure to point out the waste-basket she set aside next to his side of the bed.

"Get some rest. I'll be downstairs if you need me."

"Could-" he spoke out just as she had reached the door, his chin jutting out minutely from under cover framed by his hands gripping the cotton blanket, making him look so small and childlike.

"Could you, tell Roxanne and Minion I'm sorry? I know I must've been an asshole today, but it was the best day I've had in a while and I'm thankful for that."

She was at a loss. It took a lot for him to admit his feelings, and no doubt the alcohol probably aided in his confidence to say it out loud, but it still did not lessen her surprise.

"Yeah, I'll make sure to tell them."

"And one more thing?" he called out just as her hand rested on the light switch.

"Can you tell her I love her?"

She had to take a pause. It was taking all of her will to force herself to stay put by the door without expression, but his hands holding the blanket up to his wide eyes, being surrounded by the stuffed animals-

"I think she already knows, but I'll remind her."

She turned down the lights, staying in the door frame and not closing the door until well after she was sure he had fallen deep into sleep.

* * *

 **I need some salt to scrub off all that sweetness in the end, I forgot how loaded I made it, sorry guys if it was fluff overboard, I would say it's my first time writing it out such a way.  
Of course I based the ending on the "drunk boyfriend" joke, for those of you who haven't heard it a guy goes on a binger and ends up nearly destroying his apartment in the process, but when his girlfriend tries to undress him he freaks out with a yell "I have a girlfriend!".**

The little science experiment Megamind makes is pretty much Elephants Toothpaste, where you get dish soap, yeast and hydrogen peroxide (developer) to create an exothermic foam reaction bubbling out of a tube.  
It is hot and the fact that it releases so much oxygen in the process technically could be lit on fire, although some basic forms don't catch as easily. THAT DOESN'T MEAN TRY IT AT HOME.

 **So I would've waited to post this tomorrow (which is in an hour, what am I talking about?) but I'm afraid I'd get tied up so SURPRISE! Here to grant you that story I've been missing out on for a while.**

 **Now, onwards, to the others!**  
 **Maybe!**

 **The undecisive (and newly discovered ADD condition harborer)**  
 **-Crazies**


End file.
